aerial performance and more. . .
Well it finally happened, after 17 long years away from the stage, Natalia Kalashnikov has made her big come back and boy did it go with a bang!
Born to a Russian acrobat mother and Soviet spy father, Natalia joined the circus at the tender age of six. Being easily distracted she spent her later teenage years in an 80s prog rock synth band called Crimson Tide. She played a mean keytar solo but tensions with fellow band member Bambhi Lamborgini forced them to split.
Following in her father's footsteps she had a short stint in the KGB before she was booted out for excessive drinking. And there may have been an unfortunate incident involving Putin's limousine and some vomit. Oh yeah, and she lost his toupee, that can't have helped. He had to get a little scented tree and everything.
So returning to the circus that she loved so much, Natalia continued to drink her cares away and soon every evening's performance became a vodka-fuelled nebulous flashback. It seemed that no amount of paint thinner could dampen her spirits, in fact she was full of it (paint thinner and spirits that is) until one fateful evening in early June 1996 when Natalia had her terrible accident. Pirouetting perfectly on a tight-wire suspended 35ft in the air, she was distracted for a second by a lonely white dove, causing her to fall gracefully to the tent floor, a single white feather floating delicately on to her cheek. And it was all shot in black and white and she won an Oscar. Well that is how she remembers it. . . . She was actually found several streets away from the big top, tangled in some fresh smelling clothes. She had been walking a washing line several stories high whilst inebriated on paint thinner. They found her clutching the remains of a pigeon she had apparently grabbed for stability and burst in her hand like a cheap water balloon. To this day she still claims that pigeon saved her life, and keeps his beak as a talisman.
After the accident her memory is a boozy haze of travelling around Europe, trying to find some meaning in her broken life. She has spent the last few years residing as a recluse in Liverpool, watching day time television and eating pot noodles. But now, now my friends, she has made it back onto the stage and is taking the UK cabaret scene by storm!
Natalia is available to book for her death defying aerial silks act, Martini Madness giant prop act and also as a compere.
Slideshow photos by Neil Kendall and John-Paul Bichard.
Born to a Russian acrobat mother and Soviet spy father, Natalia joined the circus at the tender age of six. Being easily distracted she spent her later teenage years in an 80s prog rock synth band called Crimson Tide. She played a mean keytar solo but tensions with fellow band member Bambhi Lamborgini forced them to split.
Following in her father's footsteps she had a short stint in the KGB before she was booted out for excessive drinking. And there may have been an unfortunate incident involving Putin's limousine and some vomit. Oh yeah, and she lost his toupee, that can't have helped. He had to get a little scented tree and everything.
So returning to the circus that she loved so much, Natalia continued to drink her cares away and soon every evening's performance became a vodka-fuelled nebulous flashback. It seemed that no amount of paint thinner could dampen her spirits, in fact she was full of it (paint thinner and spirits that is) until one fateful evening in early June 1996 when Natalia had her terrible accident. Pirouetting perfectly on a tight-wire suspended 35ft in the air, she was distracted for a second by a lonely white dove, causing her to fall gracefully to the tent floor, a single white feather floating delicately on to her cheek. And it was all shot in black and white and she won an Oscar. Well that is how she remembers it. . . . She was actually found several streets away from the big top, tangled in some fresh smelling clothes. She had been walking a washing line several stories high whilst inebriated on paint thinner. They found her clutching the remains of a pigeon she had apparently grabbed for stability and burst in her hand like a cheap water balloon. To this day she still claims that pigeon saved her life, and keeps his beak as a talisman.
After the accident her memory is a boozy haze of travelling around Europe, trying to find some meaning in her broken life. She has spent the last few years residing as a recluse in Liverpool, watching day time television and eating pot noodles. But now, now my friends, she has made it back onto the stage and is taking the UK cabaret scene by storm!
Natalia is available to book for her death defying aerial silks act, Martini Madness giant prop act and also as a compere.
Slideshow photos by Neil Kendall and John-Paul Bichard.